Comedic debate rules immature men cause dating scarcity

CINDY WOLFE
STAFF WRITER

Photo by: Isaac Iniguez

Over 350 students eagerly crowded the chairs, floor and any open space in the Gentile Gallery on Sunday, March 31, to attend and participate in a debate on the cause of the claimed lack of dating at Franciscan University of Steubenville.

The motion that evening, “This house believes that the lack of dating on campus is due more to standoffish females than to immature males,” was opposed by an overwhelming majority of approximately 100 votes due to the arguments denouncing immature males as the ultimate cause of the lack of dating.

The chairman for the debate, Clement Harrold, a sophomore philosophy and theology student, introduced the motion. Harrold announced the lighthearted nature of the debate and that all proceeds would be donated to the Steubenville Aim Women’s Center. Students paid $3 for tickets to present an argument, $10 to silence speakers and $1 to buy a vote.

Beginning the debate, Emma Vansuch, a sophomore clinical psychology student, affirmed the motion by establishing the behavior of a spectrum of males on campus she described as the “JP Phenomenon.” This spectrum of males ranges from men like the so-called JP with high social skills and low commitment to men with low social skills and very high commitment.

Vansuch declared, “All the men asking women out are on the end of the spectrum. If these are the guys that women know and are notorious on campus, then women on campus have a conundrum. She will say no to both ends of the spectrum.”

Kyle Aubert, a senior economics student, also affirmed standoffish women as the cause, saying, “Girls have this problem with fairytales and princesses. They’re convinced that everything’s going to be perfect.”

The speakers opposing the motion took a less traditional approach by denouncing both the motion and the house. Will Muraski, a sophomore humanities and Catholic culture student, said, “I would like to propose there is no lack of dating on campus.”

Theresa Bova, a junior theology and catechetics student, followed Muraski by declaring, “There is no such thing as a standoffish Franny girl. Every girl on this campus is either quirky, loud and wants you to know it or just not interested. …There is no such thing as an immature boy. There are boys and there are men.”

The floor and the balcony exploded with stomps and shouts of “hear, hear!” As the floor opened, the raucous continued. Over 25 participants stepped forward to voice their opinions on the controversial motion. Speakers hurled accusations toward both parties, a gentleman performed a backward flip and participants flashed red cards to silence speakers who they deemed inappropriate or a danger to their side.

Bova closed the debate by asserting the following challenge: “Men, ask women out on dates.”

The motion was opposed by 264 votes in favor, 169 affirming and 30 abstentions.

This event was held by the Veritas Society and raised over $825 for the Aim Women’s Center.