Dear Romeo and Juliet,
It’s the first time the Resurrection Party is happening in three years, and my boyfriend won’t come with me. He’s never experienced it before, and it’s something that every Franny needs to go to at one point in the four years they’re here. He said it’s just a lame Franciscan tradition, and who wants to party for five hours after sitting in a three-and-a-half-hour Mass? I can’t show up to the Res Party without my boyfriend. How am I supposed to show him how great it’s going to be and get him to come with me?
Frustratedly,
Senior Jenny Williams
Jenny,
I bet he’s one of those guys who thinks FOPs are lame too, am I right? I mean, who doesn’t want to spend eight hours chillin’ with Jesus and their homies? To get him to understand the hype, you gotta make sure he knows about all those other “lame Franciscan traditions.” Bring him to swing dancing to show him how cool it is. Bring him to some Lord’s Days to show him what Franciscan really has going on. Heck, bring him to a Veritas society meeting. Get some of his friends to go, then get those friends to peer pressure him into going. Most importantly, though, is to tell him there will be beer at the Res Party. I’m pretty sure it’s true, and I know no Catholic man here can turn down a beer.
Have fun getting down at the Res Party,
Romeo
Dear Romeo and Juliet,
Household really has a way of screwing you over sometimes, specifically when it comes to dating. In a way, the household you join determines your dating status. I feel like the people in AMDG and Stella are just never single. Like, is it a requirement for some households to just always be going from relationship to relationship? I wouldn’t know; it’s practically understood that I’m just never going to be in a relationship — thanks, Fishers. Anyway, how do I tackle the restrictions of household stereotypes and the dating culture?
With irritation,
Junior Jack Hook
Dear Jack,
I would say the easiest way to break this stereotype is to find the girl you like and go after her like you’ve never pursued a woman before. How hard could that be? I’m talking Cupertino’s every morning. Caf dates every meal. Flowers every hour of the day. Constant texting. You think she’s tired of you? Wrong. Her only desire in life is to see your face. That will get her attention.
I can’t help but wonder if you pulled Stella into this because you’re maybe interested in one of those girls? If this is true, good for you! While it is true some households only like to date each other, that doesn’t mean you can’t be the one unique boyfriend in Stella. However, I am afraid that she may just completely ignore you if you’re not wearing an AMDG hoodie.
I have hope for you yet,
Juliet